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Motherless Daughters

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Motherless Daughters
Swap Coordinator:Tia (contact)
Swap categories: Letters & Writing 
Number of people in swap:19
Location:International
Type:None
Last day to signup/drop:January 31, 2009
Date items must be sent by:March 1, 2009
Number of swap partners:1
Description:

I am a motherless daughter and although it has been over 5 years, I am not the same. I love creating art to place my grief in and release it from me so I am left free to be happy, light, and joyful and a great mom to my own children.

For this swap you will send your partner a picture of your mom and tell her all about your mom. You can tell the good and the bad, the grieving and the newfound knowledge that can only come from losing a mom or the ugly, the anger, the regret and the guilt.

How to do this...it can be in the form of a letter, a poem, an ATC, a deco, a mini book...whatever art form that best holds the words or images that you want to express and share about your mom.

Please be sure to have a picture of your mom somewhere.

Seems like this would be a swap that would automatically get a heart because we are dealing with such raw emotions. Be kind to your partners who have shared such an intimate moment and person from their lives.

Above is a picture of my mom on our deck with my son Jacob when he was 3....now he is 19 and grandmotherless.

I will absolutely angel and hope to be contacted from each of you to hear about your motherless journey!

Discussion

NaughtyElf 01/22/2009 #

What a beautiful and emotional swap. My mother is fortunately still with me although terminal with gall bladder cancer. I will think of you all and lift up positive thoughts for all mothers here and past.

jannikinz 01/22/2009 #

Lovely idea Tia. Too early yet for me write about it, less than a year. Good luck with the swap.

chelle523 01/22/2009 #

I have a question - is this only for swappers whose mothers have passed away or just anyone that doesn't have a mother in their life (i.e. mother left) ?

cassied 01/22/2009 #

Wow!!! what a timely swap. I lost my mom Feb. 5 2007. I took last Feb. 5 off to 'be with her'. So this is a perfect activity to do for the day. Its still raw, and still makes me angry, but I'll do my best to not make it too 'dark'. Thanks for hosting this swap.

bettflow09 01/22/2009 #

OMG!!! I lost my mother a little over 5 years ago. Will be 6 years this coming Thanksgiving. I miss her as much today as I ever have! I wish I could participate in this swap, but I won't be able to this time. Maybe we can have another swap like this in the near future. I will definately be in next time:))

Tia 01/22/2009 #

I am blessed just reading the comments. I look forward to getting to know each of you. Sometimes it is dark, some times it is angry-filled, and sometimes when we are at our smallest moment, we feel our moms surrounding us with eternal love. All entries and journeys are worthy of sharing and will lift us all up. Thank you for leaving comments. XXOO Tia :)

LaTosi 01/22/2009 #

I lost my mom 12 years ago this coming November and I assure you it doesn't change. Maybe you can handle it a bit better but the pain never goes away.I'm getting all emotional just writing this. I would love to be part of this and share with someone what a beautiful, selfless person my bella mamma was.

CraftDiva4 01/22/2009 #

I'm putting this on my watch list for now but know I will be joining. It's been almost 4 years since I lost my mother, best friend anc crafting partner in crime. Thank you for hosting this swap. I feel so close to her when I'm crafting so crafting about her will help the wounds.

MuzicChiq 01/22/2009 #

I have been a motherless daughter for 18 years, and i am 25. Do the math, and i lost my mother at 7 from colon caner. Anyways, i think this is a WONDERFUL swap. And for those that are grieving, a book i HIGHLY recommend is "Motherless Daughters"... it will give you SO much insight.

countrygirl58 01/22/2009 #

I also lost my mom due to cancer and I think this is an awesome way to honor our mothers. I'm 50 now and my friends are losing their moms now to old age related issues, and I went through all that over 20 years ago. I think it makes us all "old" souls. And I'm sure everyone has a story. It would make a great book, putting everyone together and publishing. I bet it would be a best seller!

countrygirl58 01/22/2009 #

Actually it's been closer to 30 years for me, but it is one pain that never leaves you.

Drachenfrau 01/23/2009 #

I lost my Mom 14 years ago due to cancer, like so many other Ladies here. :-( I think this is a great swap to honour them. Thanks for setting this up Tia! :-)

tkoufus 01/23/2009 #

i los t my mum when i was 6. i only have one photo of her so i am not going to send it in the mail. will a photocopy of it do? the photo is in black and white. my mum got lost to us by walking out and we dont know where she is. i am 44 now. very sad but i would love to write something in her honour.

mommy2dylan 01/23/2009 #

What a great swap. I am already crying. I lost my Mom a little over a year ago. I was 5 1/2 months pregnant with my Son. She never got to meet her first Grandchild. I am going to put this on my watch list and see if I can do it. It is still really hard and I miss her lots everyday.

cupcakechica 01/23/2009 #

i'm getting teary eyed too...i can't finish reading the comments as i am at work. the only issue i have is, i dont consider myself "motherless"...i have a mother. she's just in heaven :) and i know she's always with me.

My mother passed away 6 1/2 years and theres not a day that i don't miss her or need her. She left me too soon. Everything good about me is all because of her. If I can be half the mother to my son that she was to me, I will have exceeded my goal of being a good mother.

Tia 01/23/2009 #

Reading these comments are so beautiful and healing. The tears kept coming as I read them. I remember when I lost my momma thinking, "I don't want to be someone who says, I lost my mom a year a go...3 years ago...20 years ago..." whatever. It's so wrong to not have my mom to talk to about her precious grandkids, my issues as I age....I want to talk to her, commiserate with her, go out and eat with her...all those things that have been ripped away from me and my children. My dad and brother....my childhood family has been irrevocably changed. I am forever changed. I cried to my husband how I needed him to be more understanding b.c I had lost my mom and his comment was I need you to be more understanding b/c I lost my wife. He was right! I am so different than I was before I was a motherless daughter. It is fascinating and gut-wrenching. I am so looking forward to knowing more about all your precious moms and of course we are sending copies of our photos tkoufus. That is another thing I have learned by losing my mom. Let people take my picture even if I feel fat, ugly, my hair is having a bad day...whatver b/c those pictures will be so important to my children one day. I don't have many pictures of my mom either b/c she was camera phobic, always felt too fat, too this...too that and all I remember and see is her beautiful face and kissable cheeks! My disabled/mentally retarded brother said it best when he asked me, "What do you miss most about mom" and I said,"Talking to her, being with her, etc what do you miss?" and my brother said,"Her face". So pure and loving and the longest most intimate conversation we have shared in 46 years of life together. I wish I could tell my mom how awesome he is turning out! Love and Hugs to all, xxoo Tia

tkoufus 01/23/2009 #

oh tia that is beautiful. i think this swap is going to be a great healing time for all.

Josietai 01/24/2009 #

I'm speechless and my tears kept flowing while reading all the comments above. I took some time to calm down before I can start typing now. This is such a wonderful swap and I can clearly see that it has touched our inner hearts deeply. I do hoped that the other swappers who dont qualified for this swap shall be very very happy & lucky. Go hug your mom now or call her to say you love her very much. Appreciate her while you can before having regrets like I do.

I lost my mom 2 years + 3 months ago due to kidney failure. She's a perfect mother and the pilar of strengh for the entire family. So, things crushed down when she was on dialysis in 2001/2002. Her mood changed drastically and we can tell from her cookings. However, her sufferings ended in October 2006 after spending more than 3 months in the hospital. Our lifes certainly changed in so many ways. One of my younger brother still hold regrets for not spending more time with her and has since have sleepless night. My sister & i still cries whenever we talk or even think of her. Although we know she is in heaven now but we still misses her very very much (I believe its a feeling we all can relate to).

I'm not sure I'll be able to sign up just yet as this is too emotional for me to be involved now. I'll keep a watch out and hopefully be able to join later. Sorry...

Meanwhile, zillion thanks to my new found sis, Drachenfrau for guiding me to this amazing swap =) Also, thank you Tia for giving me and the others here a chance to spill out our emations. Not sure about the others but I felt much much better now. Thanks Tia!

Drachenfrau 01/24/2009 #

Hugs to all of you here! And you'll be in my heart Josie!

sewhappy 01/26/2009 #

What a beautiful swap. My mother died last year on March 31, 2008 after a long, horrible battle with Alzheimer's. It was my oldest daughter's birthday - her first granddaughter. It has been a long 10 months without her. Thank you for giving us all the opportunity to share with someone who understands our pain and our joy. Hugs. :)

YankeeUnicorn 01/26/2009 #

Wow. What a wonderful swap idea....I lost my mom in 2006 to emphysema and I still love and miss her everyday!! Breaks my heart!!!

curlygirl 01/27/2009 #

Okay, what a healing experience to read all of your posts. I lost my mom June 4, 2007 after a two year bout with breast cancer. She was my best friend, cheer leader, partner in crime (sundae runs). I used to make all of my crafts just for her. I sewed her special dresses and outfits and then made jewelry for them. I wrote her poems for the cards I made for her. My mom was one of the most selfless and amazing people I've ever known. At her memorial, so many people just kept telling us how much she inspired them. I know I am not the same person, sister, friend, or teacher I was before I lost my mom. Before joining this site I had all but stopped crafting. So it has been a big help. There is still this huge empty space that I know will always be there. WE ALL KNOW THIS! I feel like I am healing v e r y s l o w l y...and then something out of the blue will strike me a certain way and I'm bawling like a baby. I know how hard it's been for all of you. I look forward to hearing from & sharing with my partners. Thank you so much for this swap. I didn't know I needed it until I found it!

alenahan 01/28/2009 #

my mother has been gone 7 years now and you just dont know how big a loss it is until you are in that situation. i still think of something i know i could ask her and think i should call her and have to stop her. my parent's phone number was in my cell under mom because my dad had a business and that number was under dad. the number is still under mom and when my cell rings and the caller id says mom its sad and yet it makes me smile too. i cant wait to do this, hope it is cathartic for me and whoever gets my submission. good luck to all and invest in some tissues!

Tia 01/28/2009 #

Thank you for leaving the most beautiful messages! I love reading them and not feeling so alone for missing my mom. So many times I meet people who have lost a mom and are they are like...blah blah...my mom died...blah blah...and I am like, "Isn't it horrific?", "Aren't you changed? , Isn't it hard" etc and then they are still like,"Blah blah blah" and I am left to meanly think,"Well, I guess they didn't love their mom as much as I loved mine!" I can tell from these posts that we are a group of women who loved our moms and are trying to continue our lives as a living legacy to our special moms. Although, I am still bitter that my mom was stolen away from me without warning and when she was so yong (59), I cherish that I had her with me for 41 of my years. Thank you for joining my swap. xxoo Tia

YankeeUnicorn 01/29/2009 #

Yes I too have found alot of healing in knowing I am not alone in these sorrows! To whomever my partner will be, I am hoping that you won't mind but I would like to E-Mail my swap instead of snail mailing it--I have some items I would love to share but can only do it via email.....Just thought I would throw the idea out there:)

DebP 01/31/2009 #

I just lost my mom a couple weeks ago. And this swap sounds great, but maybe too much too soon for me. Maybe you can make it a yearly swap.

curlygirl 02/ 1/2009 #

I think this should actually be a group...does anyone else feel this way? It would be great to do swaps for mother's day or even each month for our mom's birthdays! Then people could join the group & then swap when they are ready.

danhoneybun 02/ 1/2009 #

i am so excited to do this. are we meant to email or post a letter?

YooperHill 02/ 1/2009 #

A group - YES!!!!

I lost my mom in 35 years ago. I still have a VERY hard time going to church because it reminds me of the perfect little family I had until she was taken from me. I cry almost every time I go. It has been really difficult...even this many years later.

Drachenfrau 02/ 2/2009 #

@group = great idea. It came to my mind last week, that it would be a wonderful thing. I'm in! :-)

Tia 02/ 3/2009 #

I'm in also but I don't know how to set up a group. Do you mean on swap-bot or like a yahoo group?

Drachenfrau 02/ 5/2009 #

I would prefer a swapbot-group . :-) You can create one, if you click on "groups" and then "create". Hope, this helps.

Josietai 02/ 8/2009 #

Yes! A group will be great! Let me know when its up!

danhoneybun 02/10/2009 #

can someone please confirm for me whether this needs to be posted or emailed?

Drachenfrau 02/10/2009 #

I understand this should be snail mail.

danhoneybun 02/12/2009 #

perfect! thanks a lot love!

xkryssix 02/17/2009 #

I just found this swap... Let me know if you do another one!

Jenann82 02/21/2009 #

I wish i would have found this swap sooner! This may have helped get out some grief that I have been living with for over 12 years.

curlygirl 02/27/2009 #

I would join this swap in an instant. I know I posted the idea first, but w/working full time & going to school part time...I barely have time for swaps. If someone else starts it, I would gladly help out. I think it would help a lot of people!

curlygirl 02/27/2009 #

Sorry - meant I would join this 'group', not 'swap'. It's past my bedtime here - up working on swaps :)

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